The following topics are included in our Family Program meetings:
There is no additional cost for family members to participate in the Family Program. Renaissance Recovery Outpatient Family Program includes weekly family educational classes, group therapy, and attendance at 12 step family support groups. Families can make a difference by seeking help – not just for the alcoholic/addict – but for the entire family system.
Things You Can Do For the Addict
Things You Can Do For Yourself
Helpful Links for Family and Friends of Addicts
THERE IS HOPE!
- Spirituality
- Al-Anon 12 Steps
- Journaling
- Codependency
- Bibliotherapy
- Shame awareness and resilience
- Character Defects/Assets
There is no additional cost for family members to participate in the Family Program. Renaissance Recovery Outpatient Family Program includes weekly family educational classes, group therapy, and attendance at 12 step family support groups. Families can make a difference by seeking help – not just for the alcoholic/addict – but for the entire family system.
Things You Can Do For the Addict
- Educate yourself on addiction and recovery.
- Try not to accuse or judge. Avoid name calling. This is a difficult time for both of you.
- Provide a sober environment that reduces triggers for using.
- Allow the addict time to go to meetings.
- Understand that your lives will change. Do not wish for your old life back. Your old life to some extent is what got you here. You both need to create a new life where it is easier to not use alcohol or drugs.
- Make sure that you both have time for fun. People use alcohol and drugs to relax, escape, and as a reward. The addict needs to find alternative ways to relax, escape, and as a reward otherwise they will turn back to their addiction.
- Do not enable. Do not provide excuses or cover up for the addict.
- Do not shield the addict from the consequences of their addiction. People are more likely to change if they have suffered enough negative consequences.
- Set boundaries that you all agree on. The goal of boundaries is to improve the health of the family as a whole. Do not use boundaries to punish or shame.
- If you want to provide financial support, buy the goods and services the addict needs instead of giving them money that they might use to buy alcohol or drugs.
- Recognize and acknowledge the potential the addict has within them.
- Behave exactly as you would if your loved one had a serious illness. What would you do if they were diagnosed with heart disease or cancer?
Things You Can Do For Yourself
- Take care of yourself. Living with an addict is exhausting. You also need time to recover.
- Avoid self-blame. You can’t control another person’s decisions, and you can’t force them to change.
- Do not work harder than the person you’re trying to help. The best approach is to not do things for the addict, but instead to be an example of balance and self-care.
- Being a caretaker is not good for you or the addict. Understand that there is only so much you can do to change another person.
- Ask for help. Talk to a professional. Go to a support group such as Al-Anon. (More support groups are listed below.)
- Do not argue or try to discuss things with the addict when they are under the influence. It won’t get you anywhere.
- If at all possible, try not to be negative when dealing with the addict. That may only increase their feelings of guilt and push them further into using.
Helpful Links for Family and Friends of Addicts
- Al-Anon.org (al-anon.org) For family members of alcoholics.
- Nar-anon (nar-anon.org) For family members of addicts.
- Gam-anon (gam-anon.org) For family members of gamblers.
- Coda.org (coda.org) For co-dependent individuals.
- Adultchildren.org (adultchildren.org) For adult children of alcoholics and addicts.
- Addictionrecovery.lds.org/find-a-meeting?lang=eng (LDS.org) For all LDS 12 step support meetings in your area.
THERE IS HOPE!